She's gotten so great at pretending. New people she meets tell her constantly how funny she is. How she is always laughing and smiling, but all the while she is denying her sadness because she doesnt want to bring anyone else down. She hides that frown when everyone is around but then drowns in her own despair as she sits there alone with her thoughts. They just pile up, until the weight is too heavy to bare. She wonders if anyone cares enough to see past the rehearsed smile and forced laughter to ask her how she's really doing.
Because she really isnt doing well.
She wonders is anyone will can tell and furthermore, if anyone will ever be able to help.
She tells herself to keep trying, that one day if she just keeps smiling, she'll feel it, that happiness that has eluded her for years.
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