Saturday, October 27, 2018

Matthew 5:5

I have torn myself down with words of unkindness
I am reminded when I look in the mirror
That I have carried a fear of
being myself for so long
Only seeing what is wrong in my reflection
But my perspective is beginning to change
I am learning to refrain from self hate;
And to fight the urge to create someone that I am not
I'm learning to stop trying to live up to expectations of happiness
For I am blessed simply to be alive.
- Brianna Carey 

Thursday, August 23, 2018

Our True Identity

Insecurities. All of us have them but when they lie unaddressed or we remain in denial of them for a period of time, they can take hold within us like bad weeds in a garden, and we start to decay and become a shell of ourselves. Instead of recognizing them and then working on them, we tuck them away and shrug them off. The same way we did when the root cause of them happened to begin with. It could have been an unkind word spoken years ago from someone whose opinion of you, you sincerely valued. It could be an ex that made you feel less than. It could be that one time that someone called you a name and that name stuck with you and subconsciously became part of your identity.

Whatever the reason we become insecure, we have to admit it first in order to heal, even if that means a bruised ego or taking another slight hit to our esteem in order to heal. It has to be addressed. Why do we feel less than? Why do we feel as though we are not beautiful enough just as we are? Who told us that we were not enough, and why did we believe them?

Then comes the practice of forgiveness both towards those people, and forgiveness towards ourselves for grouping together the negative opinions of others about us, and shaping them into an unrealistic image and an unattainable persona we are so desperately trying to achieve.

The problem is not that we are failing at becoming amazing people, its that we are failing to recognize that we are already amazing.

We are beautiful. Just as we are.

No one with half a heart gets through this life unscathed by the unkind words of another but we don't have to hold onto them. Nor do we have to live up to an idealistic version of perfect we've been led to believe exists. No. We can make a choice starting today to just BE. Be present in each moment. Be aware of our blessings. Be happy with our own reflection rather than comparing ourselves to the image of another. Be more concerned with being beautiful inside, rather than out. Be more thankful. Be more grateful. Be more truthful. Be quintessentially, and unapologetically ourselves.

Because you are the only YOU in this world. And you ARE enough. You were fearfully and wonderfully made. Jesus looked at all of creation and thought this world still needed YOU. You are not a waste. You are not a lost cause. You are beginning anew each and every day that you awake, and your story is not over. Your journey is not finished, and your purpose is being fulfilled with every honest moment you experience. You are beautiful, with your scars, with your mistakes, and with your insecurities. Your worth does not deplete simply because some do not recognize it, and your value is not deemed invalid simply because someone doesn't think you measure up. Why? Because your identity is not in the opinion of others, it's not in your failures, it's not in your flaws, it's not even in what you think of yourself. It is IN CHRIST, held safely and securely, out of reach of all negativity, and unchanged by any earthly circumstance, good or bad, that you experience. It cannot be altered by any opinion for it has been firmly established well before you were even born by a loving and doting Father. By God, who holds you in high esteem even when you do not hold yourself there.

- Brianna Carey 

Friday, August 10, 2018

She Keeps Trying

She's gotten so great at pretending. New people she meets tell her constantly how funny she is. How she is always laughing and smiling, but all the while she is denying her sadness because she doesnt want to bring anyone else down. She hides that frown when everyone is around but then drowns in her own despair as she sits there alone with her thoughts. They just pile up, until the weight is too heavy to bare. She wonders if anyone cares enough to see past the rehearsed smile and forced laughter to ask her how she's really doing.

Because she really isnt doing well.

She wonders is anyone will can tell and furthermore, if anyone will ever be able to help.

She tells herself to keep trying, that one day if she just keeps smiling, she'll feel it, that happiness that has eluded her for years.

Wednesday, June 20, 2018

Quotes

"If you do not have Love as the foundation on which you build, no matter how fortified your empire is, it will fall." - Brianna Carey

Tuesday, June 19, 2018

Poems To My Love Kyle: Series 1

You're my whole world....
I wish I could put into words the way I feel
Its surreal to me
Still... you're a fantasy
Like a dream I dont want to awaken from
Its taken some, time to get used to being loved again
But you understand
My heart is fragile, and still recovering
But you're so gentle and loving when....
You speak to me
I long to be near you 
It's clear you feel the same
I hope you'll never change
Stay the same, until we are old and grey...
I love you babe. 
♥️ Your Bri 

Saturday, June 16, 2018

Your Plan. Your Purpose.

I feel a sense of Peace
Like a calm breeze that brushes your cheeks on a hot day
I feel at ease, but I want You to stay
I need You present
I want to always feel this content. 
And not just for a moment but for all time
Jesus.... take my mind and renew it
It’s You that I’m pursuing 
with everything that I am 
It’s You that makes me new and 
directs the steps of my plans 
See, it’s You who understands 
where I have been and where I stand
I recognize that I can’t, do this without You 
So I need You to break through any fantasies
Any delusions of what I think my life should be 
And help me to walk in Your purpose and plan for me
For I know that what you have planned for me
far exceeds even the most imaginative of my dreams
May my eyes always see that You know what is right
And may I forever walk by Faith and not by sight. 

- Brianna Carey ©️



Extend Love.

I don’t like when people judge. It’s one thing to want the best for someone, and try to redirect their life to better reflect that of Christ’s, but it’s another to pretend as though you are sinless, and project a since or arrogance towards someone simply because their sin looks different from yours. As if God has a scale on which he weighs some sins as far worse than others. It’s like, I want to tell them, ‘you do understand that gossiping about someone is equivalent to murder, right, that no one sin is greater than another in God’s eyes.’ It’s not as if Jesus died for a particular list of sins only. No. He died for our SIN. Singular, not a laundry list of sins. He was crucified for our inability to be without sin. His blood was shed as payment for the sin that plagues our hearts. His flesh was torn due to the transgressions of our flesh. If we neglect to admit our sin, or that we are still sinners (yes, even after being saved), then we make light of what Jesus did on the cross for all of us. 

“If we claim that we’re free from sin, we’re only fooling ourselves. A claim like that is errant nonsense. On the other hand, if we admit our sins—make a clean breast of them—He won’t let us down; He’ll be true to Himself. He’ll forgive our sins and purge us of all wrongdoing. If we claim that we’ve never sinned, we out and out contradict God—make a liar out of Him. A claim like that only shows off our ignorance of God.” - 1 John 1:8-10 MSG 🕊

When He said “It is Finished.” He meant finished. He didn’t say, “wait, actually there is more that is required of you before you can be forgiven, you have to do this, this, and this also before My sacrifice can be applied to your life.” He didn’t say “you need to go through these steps in order to obtain My grace and forgiveness.” The acceptance of Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior, and putting your faith into Him wholeheartedly, are the only requirements for salvation. 

Salvation has nothing to do with being sinless; it has everything to do with being free from the consequences of our sin. The fact is, we should be punished but instead He was punished in our place and that’s too profound of a merciful act for me to make light of. It’s why I will never look down on anyone for whatever sin they are standing in right now, because I know that there is no hole deep enough that God cannot venture. There is no place dark enough that the Holy Spirit will not go to find you, right in the midst of your mess simply to remind you of His presence. And there is NO SIN greater than what Jesus did for me and for you on the cross so that we may LIVE without the burden of sin hanging over our heads. 

People know well enough the sins they struggle with, without a proud Christian trying to convince them of how they’ll never be an exemplary Christian like they are. The devil is a Liar. There is no exemplary or perfect Christian, nor will there ever be. Even after you accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, you are still a sinner, the only difference between you and the person who does not yet know Jesus; is that they don’t know that they no longer have to suffer the consequences of their sins. How about you show them the way. How about you teach them about His grace, or speak life into them about who they truly are in Christ. How about you tell them that they have a Redeemer, and have already been forgiven, that they are Loved deeply, as a daughter or son of a King, despite their mistakes. Can you do that, instead of making them feel even worse about the state they are in by your judgment and condemnation of them? Can we love a little deeper, please? Can we open our hearts a bit wider to hear people out and try and understand and empathize with where they are currently and how they ended up there? Can we show a bit more compassion for our brothers and sisters? I hope we can. Because we are all beautiful regardless of our flawed nature. We all still hold a purpose in Him. We are all on this earthly journey together doing the best that we can with what we’ve been dealt in our lives. We all belong to Jesus, it’s just some of us don’t yet know it, and we need some beautiful Christ-like soul out there (A Christian unafraid to be real and vulnerable) to come and find us in the dark places others are too proud to go, to simply stand by our side, in our sin, and be a positive light in our lives so that we may see ourselves as we truly are.... as a son and daughter of a Loving Father, instead of feeling as though we dont belong anywhere. 

Someone out there is waiting for you right now, to be the one person who doesn’t judge them, but instead hugs them, loves on them, speaks life into them; invites them to church consistently hoping that one day, you get a yes, and in the interim, that you’ll be the one praying for them, going to God on their behalf, praying that the Holy Spirit can penetrate their heart and make them see who they truly are so that they come to know Christ as you have.

“For this is how God loved the world; He gave His one and only Son, so that EVERYONE who believes in Him will not perish, but have eternal life.” - John 3:16 NLT 

It’s not our place to judge and decide who gets to have eternal life. Jesus has already decided that it’s everyone who believes in Him. Don’t make light of His promises, His Word, His sacrifice, His grace. His Love is and should always be, extended to anyone, anywhere. No matter the sin, no matter the circumstances. God, let us be the one unafraid to extend that Love. 
  • Brianna Carey 

Monday, June 11, 2018

MY HOPE IS THAT YOU UNDERSTAND

I never knew
just how blessed I was to have a mother like you
I wasnt always grateful
In fact I was sometimes hateful
I wish I could take back any out of turn thing I said
I wish I could bring back every single day that we spent
When you were alive
So that I could treat you right
Never hurt your feelings or make you cry
My sweet mommy, the guilt I carry inside
For any unkind word I uttered in my life
I shutter to think that I
may have disappointed you....
I never wanted to...
I wish I could have just one more day
to touch your face
To hug you and say
All the things I never got the chance too
Like I'm sorry for what I put you through
Any nights that I made you worry
I'm so sorry
For any time that I yelled
when you were just trying to help....
My heart was shattered even then...
My mind was unwell.... I was struggling
And I still am....
I can only pray that you understand
I can still remember your hands
in their shaky and weakened state
You reaching up for my face
to comfort me when I was crying....
Even as you were dying,
you thought of me first....
You didnt want me to hurt
Even at your worst....
Your concern was for me
You loved me unconditionally, and I can never repay you...

My sweet Mommy....

All that you went through
And not once did you complain
You maintained a smile that will remain in my heart forever...
Until the day we are together again
And I can hold you and tell you then
How so very proud I am
To be your daughter...
How thankful I am to call you my Mother....
I LOVE YOU...so very much.

Sunday, May 13, 2018

By The Sea

The ocean waves comfort me, as I lay by the sea. The anxiety begins to ease as the breeze blows away all my cares.


Written By: Brianna C. Carey